Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Odds 'N Ends

1) Well, um, no. But I've heard it's really bad for kids.

Many people are against same-sex couples raising children. Often, however, you will find that those who oppose same-sex parenting don't actually know anyone who has undertaken the endeavor or who was raised by gay and lesbian couples. That, I suppose, was the funniest part about this article about same-sex parenting, in which the author of a "marriage defense" book claims that children of same-sex parents grow up "confused" and "hurt" while, a few sentences later, admitting that "she doesn't personally know any same-sex parents or their children."

But, you know, even though the research to date has shown no inherent deficits among same-sex parents, it's probably just a commonsensical self-evident truth that same-sex parenting is bad.

2) A Child Called Pop

Determined to prevent their child from "being forced into a specific gender mould," a couple in Sweden is keeping the biological sex of their child a secret. Only a few people know the biological sex of the child, whom they call "Pop," and "The child's parents said so long as they keep Pop’s gender a secret, he or she will be able to avoid preconceived notions of how people should be treated if male or female."

To present an "other side" to these parent's actions, the article cites psychologist Susan Pinker who draws a parallel between this case and the case of an infant boy whose penis was accidentally removed during a circumcision and who was subsequently raised as a girl. When that child was a teenager "she" rebelled against the femininity that was forced upon her, later transitioned to a male, and ultimately denounced what was done to him before committing suicide at the age of 38.

Rather than being a strike against how this Swedish couple is raising Pop, however, that tragic story actually supports raising children without gender norms. The key difference between the case Pinker cites and Pop's case, of course, is that instead of forcing Pop into the male or female box, Pop's parents are letting Pop decide who Pop is without those preconceived notions of what s/he can or should be based on whether s/he is a male or female. For instance:

"Pop's wardrobe includes everything from dresses to trousers and Pop's hairstyle changes on a regular basis. And Pop usually decides how Pop is going to dress on a given morning" [emphasis added].

Allowing children to make these choices for themselves is much different than parents (or anyone else) making these decisions for them. It is when a person doesn't have a choice as to his or her own gender that is traumatic.

3) Quotes of the Week

Hey everybody, Jose Solano still keeps talking about anal sex:

"The engagement in anal intercourse is an immersion in feces."

A bit later, he goes beyond equating sex between two people of the same sex with bestiality and actually argues that homosex is the worse sexual behavior:

"Two men having sex with each other is actually worse than a man having sex with a sheep or a dog because in the former you have two men debasing themselves while in the latter only one man."

I first encountered the anti-gay blog that Jose is a part of, Opine Editorials, about two years ago. While I used to find Jose's ejaculations on the utter depravity of two men engaging in anal sex to be a virtual well-spring of entertainment, I now only find it incredibly disappointing to see that he remains mired in habitually responding to pro-gay arguments by opining upon the utter depravity of men using their penises for something they weren't "designed" to do. For, revolving around his visceral disgust with gay male anal sex are all of the many ways he opposes the rights, recognition of, and benefits for same-sex couples and LGBT people.

Solano's ruminations on anal sex are, unfortunately, pretty common amongst men who oppose LGBT rights. Nary a word is mentioned about lesbians, you will find, as many of these folks place a Primacy on the Penis and what It is and isn't doing to whom and which bodily orifice. This Penis-centricity simultaneously erases lesbians while continuing that tired old meme that sex, sex that matters anyway, does not and cannot occur without the Penis. That's why, whenever some folks actually mention lesbians it's always with that air of Oh yes, and lesbians are gross too. But anyway back to what I was talking about before. Why that would be Penises, of course, and what other men are doing with theirs. It is sad how many heterosexual men have so bought into the idea of the all-important Penis that they cannot stop thinking about how society might completely and totally collapse if some men aren't using their dicks "correctly."

And, other than that, people who get this upset about other people's sex lives, something they have no control over, I think are living in a hell of their own making. Within one of Solano's rants, his seething, foaming disgust drips off the screen. Why some people think they are entitled to restrict other people's rights based on what two consenting adults do in the privacy of their own homes is something I'm still trying to understand. I have a hunch that when it comes down to it, the ire that some men feel towards anal sex comes from the fact that when men use their penises for something other than procreation, it de-centers the penis from that phallo-centric role of "plough, seed, grain chute, and ovipositor all in one" that some people fancy it is and oh dear we can't have that, can we? In any event, believe it or not, it does make me sad to see that people can become so discombobulated talking about homosexuality and anal sex.

No comments: