Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Men Need MAN SODA!

OMFG. People are so weird invested in creating artificial distinctions between men and women.

Via The Mary Sue, I learned that Dr. Pepper is marketing its new low calorie soda specifically to men.

[Description of ad, which I refuse to post here: Image of a silver "gun metal grey" Dr. Pepper Ten can that has the words "10 BOLD tasting calories" on it. Next to the can is the helpful hint: "It's Not For Women"]

Ooga booga grunt grunt! Dr. Pepper Ten: For all you fellas who prioritize not being associated with girly shit over not getting diabetes.

And don't you worry, ladies:

“Jim Trebilcock, executive vice president of marketing for Dr. Pepper, said he’s not worried that [women will] be offended by the campaign. The drink and marketing were tested in six different markets across the country before being rolled out nationally, and women weren’t offended, he said. In fact, about 40% of people who have tried the soda so far are women.”


But do these totally-not-offended ladies know that they were actually drinking a processed, liquified sugar-water mixture of trucknutz, ammo, and footballs*?

*That's not true. Product may actually contain ingredients similar to the products that ladies drink. But we can't acknowledge that and let men in on the fact that they enjoy products that are sullied by the inferior taint of femininity and women. Shhhhhhhhh! The gender complementary myth will be our little secret.


Men Need Manland!

Man Food

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