Tuesday, July 22, 2008

RightWing Roundup: Theocracies, Confused Bigots, and Vegans

1. Another Reason We Don't Want an American Theocracy

What I find ironic about Christian dominionists is that they use the American principle of freedom of religion as a tool to attempt to prevent other religions from flourishing in our nation. They see no problem with the concept of theocracy. Such a form of government is, in fact, their ultimate goal. Thus, their main objection to oppressive Muslim theocracies in the Middle East is not that these nations are theocracies, but rather that it's the "wrong" "god" via the "wrong" religion that's in charge.

The comparisons between fundamentalist factions of the three major Abrahamic faiths are numerous, in fact. What immediately comes to mind is the common condemnation of homosexuality and the oppression of women all, of course, which hinge on the alleged word of a "god."

Thanks but no thanks.

A most intolerant tenet of Christian dominionism is to have a legal system calling for the execution of homosexuals (via stoning or burning) in accordance with "biblical law." The Middle Eastern nation of Dubai doesn't go that far, but here is a little taste of what we could look forward to in an American theocracy:

The pseudo-Western nation of Dubai, part of the United Arab Emirates (UAE), recently detained 17 foreigners who "allegedly displayed homosexual behavior in malls and other public places." Unfortunately for these men, "outward homosexual behavior" is banned in the UAE.

The only question I can muster at this situation is what sort of "homosexual behavior" did these men exhibit in a shopping mall? Ridiculing someone's shoes?

Good times.

2. "Genital Drives"?...... Weird.

Marriage defenders often like to joke that gay people are gay because they're just "confused." What follows sort of demonstrates that that claim is sort of a projection. Straight people obsessed with gay sex come off, actually, quite confused themselves. I think that the idea of two men together so flusters, enrages, or arouses some of these anti-gays so much that they lose all ability to think rationally.

Recent winner of the Box Turtle Bulletin's LaBarbera Award, Arizona Republican candidate for Congress Joe Sweeney confounds us all in an interview:

"Q: So, again I’m going to ask the same question I asked Mr. Chewning. Basically, a secular reason why two consenting adults of the same sexual orientation should not be married or allowed to be married.

Sweeney: Well because it’s addictive and it creates social chaos, social problems.

Q: Just out of curiosity, what would you base that on?

Sweeney: Well I would base that on the fact that people come together with their genital drives, and they either bridle their genital drives — and that’s what a marriage contract is supposed to be about — or they just go around acting like they can go whoring down in Nogales or prostituting anywhere they want, they can do whatever they want with their bodies. They don’t have any higher responsibility other than their own gratification. Hedonism, which is maximizing pleasure over pain. And that’s what happens at Nogales every night when they go down there whoring and causing all the social strife. Now they got those kids in the whorehouses in Nogales coming up here to Tucson to be anchor babies. You know I’ve witnessed that stuff.

Q: Okay, so there’s another question following that. You guys both have said marriage should be between a man and a woman. What about a transgender person who used to be a man, now became a woman and wants to marry a man.

Sweeney: Well, I’ve got a friend like that. And… you know… That’s what he wants to do with his social activity and his life, his social functioning, that’s up to him, you know? But to say that we have to validate that, the rest of society has to validate that kind of behavior, you know, let him conduct his behavior the way that he’s going to conduct his behavior. You know, I don’t agree with prostitution in Mexico, but they have laws that say it’s a way of functioning, socially functional society five feet the other side of the border that allows that to happen. We think the repercussions of that totally outweigh the responsibilities.

Q: Just out of curiosity, what do you think that homosexuals have to do with whorehouses in Mexico?

Sweeney: Oh, I don’t know. We’ve got the only Southwest weekly newspaper, we’ve got more homosexuals down here than we’ve got a lot of other kinds of people.

Q: Again, what does that got to do with whorehouses in Mexico?

Sweeney: Well, what happens is you get what I call a hedonistic attractiveness to do anything and everything with your genital drive . ….

Q: Again, are the homosexuals frequenting the whorehouses?

Sweeney: I wouldn’t be surprised. Anything can happen around this town. We’ve got gay bars down on Fourth Avenue …"

It's certainly an, um, interesting tactic to talk about "homosexuals," prostitution in Mexico, and "genital drives" as many times as you can within the confines of a incoherent hot mess of an interview hoping some of those concepts stick.

What a confused man.

3. Who Are You Calling a Vegan?

Speaking of the Peter (LaBarbera), our favorite anti-gay was recently outraged that the mainstream media failed to cover his "pro-family" boycott of the McDonald's headquarters he held in Oak Brook, Illinois. Apparently, McDonald's is too pro-gay or some shit for the Peter's liking.


While only a handful of people attended the Peter's latest boring anti-gay event, a lot of entertaining things are going on his latest hissy fit of an article describing it. For one, he uses one of my favorite words- "bawdy"- to describe Chicago's Pride Parade. Secondly, he refers to the mainstream media as the "secular media," as though the media would be less biased if it were "Christian."

What really takes the cake, though, is this statement:

"The people involved in this boycott of McDonald’s are good family people — not vegans, America-hating leftists, or some other fringe group."

That was way harsh, Peter.

I can see how "Christians" might want to demonize so-called leftists and other fringe groups. But what's so bad about vegans?

I mean, I know some of them can be self-righteous moralists who make you feel guilty for biting into that delicious juicy Quarter Pounder, but I'm pretty sure that many vegans are also "good family people" too.

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